Inspired By.

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fonda nolita-4Today is a good day, friends. It’s Friday and I leave to go back to Michigan tomorrow morning for an exclusive visit just to celebrate my mom and all she’s done for me. Another reason to be happy: todayfeels like May – sunny and 65 degrees for once! And despite an impromptu outfit change at the last second [the result of a bad incident involving sour milk in an iced coffee that wound up on my white blouse] I am loving my outfit today, which always makes my day more upbeat. And I found a new album to fall in love with. And I’ve drafted four poems since Monday, one of which I posted yesterday. And I have a new idea for a weekly post that I will be implementing sometime over the weekend or next week.

For now, I’ll leave you with links to some posts that fueled some creative sparks for me this week:
I love magnolia blossoms. Gorgeous photo above found here.
Some really important thoughts on creativity: A creator doesn’t just talk about their work. They work. [I struggle with this issue daily.]
I sometimes feel this way, too.
I’ve posted this sweet wallpaper on my desktop as a reminder: to worry is a waste of time, energy and resources.
Further proof of those eight steps: Jessica has been style-blogging for four years now, but it’s been a long process of growth. See the evolution of her personal style and blogging here.
And a beautiful depiction of life’s complex symmetries found here. I dare you not to tear up.

The Dream Job : Going the Distance

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It’s never good when you get a text from your best friend that says,
“I don’t know if I feel like going out tonight. I’m all weepy and crabby today.”
Knowing her, I realize I have two choices:
1. Take her word for it, because when she says she’s in a bad mood she means it. No use arguing with her; things will only get worse.
2. Test the waters. Feel her out. Maybe what’s bothering her is worth confronting, debunking, even comforting.
I bit the bullet and chose option two.
“What’s wrong, love?” 
“Oh, probably the weather and I started freaking out about school earlier.” 
She has decided to quit her full time job working as a customer service representative for a hearing aid manufacturer [what joy] to go to culinary school. The risks are real – she’s taking on school loans, she’s going to try and juggle school work and a part time job to support herself,  not to mention that she’s quitting a full time job when more than 8 percent of the country can’t even find a part time job. She has every reason to be terrified.
And yet. I’ve seen her in a slump, exhausted of repeating the same conversation with customers more than 100 times each day. Personally, I’d rather see her bustling around a bakery, whipping up delectable pastries we can devour, even if we gain 100 extra pounds in the process. Hey, since we’re talking sacrifices, right?
But it’s a toss up, a whole lot of “I don’t want to do this part” no matter which path she takes. She doesn’t want to work the job she has forever, but she doesn’t want to take on debt, risk her financial well-being and her stamina to make it through school.
“What if I fail?” she asked in the car on our way to see my husband play on Friday. Thankfully, she had changed her mind and decided not to wallow in worry over something that’s months away.
“I’m sorry, what? You? Fail school?” I asked.
“Yeah! What if I get so frazzled trying to support myself and get through classes that I flunk out?”
A silly question, in my opinion. She, of all people I know, is least likely to fail.
But as I’ve spent the last several months fiddling with blog ideas and freelance work, I’ve asked mself the same question about nearly everything.
Grad school: what if I flunk out? So I decide to wait until life “settles down” a little bit. [I have no idea what that means, either.]
Freelancing: I’m not a business person – what if I can’t handle the responsibility?
Blogging: what if they don’t like what I wrote? What if no one cares about this but me?
I’ve come to the realization that with any dream job or career path we chose, we have to keep in mind the journey and not just the destination. We have to be willing to ask, how will I get there? And we have to be willing to go the distance.
Freelancing and blogging require a lot of capabilities that I wish I didn’t have to think about. I’ve had to work on a business plan for my freelance work. Did anyone else know that this requires math?! Even with a calculator and guidance from other freelancers I know, my brain hurts. It’s excruciatingly painful to admit that my teachers were right [although I have yet to use algebra, mwahaha.]
I’ve also had to learn HTML coding. Don’t get me wrong, I only know a handful of code thingys [is “code phrases” the proper term?] but still, who knew that ugly series of letters and symbols actually did things, and that if you can’t figure it out things might disappear?!
And apparently “not being a morning person” is not conducive to productivity. If I could change my biological make up, I would, but for now I’m just trying to find some sort realistic incentive that will convince me that God created 6 a.m. for anything other than sleep.
I can’t tell my best friend not to look at the big scary numbers or not to think about how she’s going to be able to support herself on a part-time job while she’s getting her degree. I can’t be a successful freelancer and blogger without coming up with a business plan and crunching my own numbers. I can’t even tell her where she’ll be at the end of it; she’ll have a degree, but will that mean she’ll find a job right away?
And will I want to be a freelancer forever?
I mean, aren’t I a little young to be thinking about being my own boss?
And think about all the taxes and invoices I’ll have to keep track of if I’m going to do this!
And is this blog going to be a part of my writing career for the next 30, 40, 50 or more years?
There’s so much responsibility involved, and how will we know for sure that the destination is worth the journey it takes to get there?
We don’t have the answers. I don’t think we’re meant to. But if we’re too scared to even ask the question, to pursue the “what if I try this?” then we are choosing to live in the void, the unknown of what could have been.
So here are a few inspirations from around the web to keep you motivated :
I’m officially a Midnight Hustler, are you?
Part of pursuing our dreams requires being selfish.
Writing as an expression of life. I need to read Natalie’s book (and Melissa’s blog!) more often.
The Literary Ladies’ Guide to the Writing Life. A great article and a book I need to get my hands on.

Changing Tides.

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Here’s a thought for your weekend:
“Just because the tide is out, that doesn’t mean there’s less water in the ocean.” -Seth Godin.
So just because our economy is bad, that doesn’t mean we’re lacking resources and ideas. We just have to dig deeper, go to greater distances to find them.
Speaking of resources, the people of Japan are desperate for food, clean water, gasoline, and more. I read my friend Wakako’s post and found myself in tears for the people who are stranded there. Please consider giving to For Japan With Love, which will give all proceeds to Shelter Box, which will give supplies to the people of Japan. Every donation and prayer will help.
Have a good weekend, friends.

If I Look Like One, Maybe I’ll Be One.

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I have an addiction. An addiction to blogs. And not just any blogs. Design blogs. Fashion blogs. It’s a wonderful thing to be addicted to – I can preoccupy myself by reviewing others who dress better, design better, than myself. They have the money and the means to wear all the things I can’t and drape their house in fabrics and furniture and prints that I can only dream of. And the blogs themselves – gorgeous!
I have visions of making my own blog easier on the eye than what I have at this moment. My hope is that before the end of the year, I’ll have a custom design for my blog to introduce to you. A friend is working on it for me, and I can’t wait until that day when my writing finally has a space that visually reflects the same quality.
However, like any addiction, my design-blog obsession has distracted me from what I really want, which is to delve deeper into the world of self-published writing. I’ve found a plethora of writing blogs, but I hardly ever read them because the designs are often nothing less than detestable. I don’t care if you’re the greatest writer to come along since Shakespeare. If you’ve posted your words in lime green over a cerulean background, I won’t get past the title before I click over to something more appealing. (Is there something wrong with taking the basic templates and messing with the color? Live a little, people.)
And so, I have this fear: if my blog isn’t visually appealing, it’s not worth reading no matter how well I write. Which means that my real problem boils down to this thought:
Maybe if I look like a writer, I’ll become one.
I hinge my success on how I appear to others. I may write well for my blog, but to be a successful blogger, I need to grab your attention, right?
Understandable. Proven fact with world wide web analytics. “Content is king” doesn’t matter if no one can read it.
But I can’t allow that to be my excuse not to write, right? Waiting for a better blog design is not a good reason to refrain from posting.
Once again, I find myself peeling back the layers of unnecessary negativity in my life in order to see what’s really there. Underneath it all, I have something good going for me and I need to unearth it. I need to let it out. I need to write. I need to create. I need to share it with others.
Here are some posts that have propelled me forward in my hope for my writing:
Jess Constable at Makeunder My Life has a fresh batch of wisdom every day – I can’t get enough. Read her post about why managing your business is like high school (no cringing necessary!)
Jon Acuff has some interesting things to say about selling out. What is your definition of a sell out? How do you impose that on others, and how do you allow others to impose their opinions on you?
A bad review isn’t the end of the world, right?
I found this blog today – I need more poetry in my life. And maybe I should start posting photos from my idea journal… what do you think?
Tools for writers. Exactly what I need.

“Rolling in the Deep”

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I don’t know about you, but my week coulda been better. It wasn’t a disaster at work, or fight with a friend that had me down. There are just some really hard life issues that I feel caught in the middle of.
I read a lot of blogs, and most of the authors, as talented and interesting as they are, don’t always admit things like that. Sometimes it makes me wonder, am I the only one that feels like life is caving in on me? Am I the only one that feels weighted down by the pressure of figuring out my career, my marriage, my gifts, my passions, my relationships, my faith?
I know that I am not alone. And so I am admitting that I feel weighted down and scared and frustrated… and inspired and blessed and loved… but not altogether happy right now. I don’t admit this so that you can throw me a pity party or beg me to tell you what’s wrong or so that you can give me pep talk. I’m admitting it so that in case you feel this way too, you can know that you’re not alone.
Sometimes, life is just messy.
Here are some things that really inspired me this week, in spite of everything:
Buy this album. No, really. BUY IT.*
Some funny, belated New Year’s Resolutions that I am totally stealing.
My friend Madison has started a healthy living blog – good recipes, and even better info about what’s good and bad for us and why. Happy, healthy eating!
Kendi and Bryan: Dream Reporters. They’re starting a business, and they’re blogging about their journey to success.
Check out Kat’s revamped blogspot! She’s also got a new product line coming soon, so keep an eye out for her woodland-inspired wonders.
My friend Hollie has started a blog: Baking with Ex-Mix. Join the conversation about gender, culture, and you.
Grace over Karma – that’s the kind of faith I can believe in.
Does it Really Matter? A good question to live by.
And finally, just a word of thanks to all the talented, loving, funny, inspiring people that I am surrounded by. You make it worth it. Every day.
*Blog title taken from the album. Did you buy it? Get on it.